Relationship in a rut? Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to spice things up. Take our challenge and watch sparks fly
Not every day is a bed of roses when you’re in a relationship. When family or work get in the way, we don’t always prioritise our other half. Romance can fall by the wayside, but it’s an important part of being together.
This Valentine’s Day, we’re setting you a series of challenges to refresh your relationship.
With the help of dating/relationship expert at Love Lessons Global, Sarah Louise Ryan, we’ll address five important aspects of relationships and set challenges to improve each.
By the end of the week, we hope sparks will be flying!
Quality time
Quality time can be hard to come by when you’ve got a busy family life. But it’s important for you and your partner to spend positive, joyful time, alone together.
Sarah says: ‘Couples often confuse spending any time together as “quality time”. It’s not about the amount of time but how couples use it. Nights watching Netflix can be lovely, but also plan exciting experiences together to keep the spark alive. Be consistent, thoughtful and engaging when together.’
This week, we challenge you to create a date night at home — when the kids are asleep — for at least three hours. Put your phone away and just talk.
Sex
Stress can really lower the libido, but try to prioritise sex as it can help you to bond with your partner and to feel secure and comfortable, and can actually help you relieve stress.
Sarah says: ‘Throughout this week, try simmering things up with flirtatious communications, gentle touches and kisses. This flirting will create a subtle build-up of desire.
‘At the end of the week, try having sex anywhere other than the bedroom, which can be associated with sleep and stress. It’ll spice things up!’
Communication
It’s easy to coast through days without talking — we mean really talking. But it’s vital to share how you’re feeling about your partner and life. That way, any concerns can be addressed and you can both work towards improvement.
Sarah says: ‘First of all, figure out how you and your partner communicate love, thoughts, feelings and boundaries. There are five main ways — acts of service, words of affirmation, touch, quality time and giving of gifts.
‘Take into account which ways you and your partner communicate as you set a neutral time alone to check in on things in your relationship, to discuss your thoughts and feelings, and what’s on your mind.’
Take your neutral time alone this week to air everything you feel the need to, to avoid any future resentment. The rest of the week is for romance.
Fun and laughter
Sarah says: ‘In the early stages of dating, as we forge an attachment with someone, a relationship is full of fun and sparks. As it develops that can fall by the wayside if couples are not conscious of it.
‘Laughter is the key to the heart and soul, and keeping the fun alive will keep the flame of desire burning. We want our partners to not only be there as our support, but as our best friends.’
Choose an activity that’ll get you both chuckling, like indoor games or an online comedy night. Having fun together will remind you how well you get on.
Romance
Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to inject more romance into your relationship.
Sarah says: ‘Romantic gestures are surprising, spontaneous and create a sense of romantic curiosity. They show thought, care and connection, and remind us that we are seen, heard and valued in a relationship. That’s so important in working towards longevity in love.’
This week, we challenge you and your partner to each do five romantic gestures for one another. They can be small ones, like leaving a love note by the kettle one morning, or full-on big ones. On Valentine’s Day, exchange gifts.
Edited by Kim Gregory
We’d love to hear how your challenges went. Send us your pictures or comments to Take a Break magazine’s official Facebook page.