Alpaca my hospital bag!
Gazing at the fluffy hair and big brown eyes, I smiled.
‘Morning, George!’ I called.
George, 12, was one of my seven alpacas.
It had been a dream of mine to keep alpacas, as I’d always loved their quirkiness and inquisitive nature.
They’d follow me around and closely watch whatever I was doing.
‘They’re very nosy,’ I chuckled to my husband.
They’d give us a sniff to say hello and when they wanted attention, they’d nibble our jackets.
Today, it was time to shear George.
I slipped the halter on over his neck to get him ready. But in doing so, I accidentally put my finger over his teeth.
Suddenly I felt him biting my finger.
He’d bitten down thinking it was the halter!
‘Agh!’ I cried.
I rushed inside to run water on my finger and saw it was a deep cut.
Knowing it was best to get checked out, I headed to hospital.
‘An alpaca bit me,’ I said to the nurse in A&E.
‘Excuse me?’ she asked with a giggle.
As I repeated myself, the whole waiting room looked up. It wasn’t your average accident and emergency!
Nurses cleaned and patched up my cut and gave me a tetanus injection.
Back home, George gave my plastered finger a curious sniff.
I didn’t blame him at all, it was my fault for not being careful.
It was sore for a while and I was left with a small, v-shaped scar.
Sadly, gorgeous George recently passed at the grand age of 18 — but my scar will always be a reminder of him!
Joanne Thomas, 48, Llandrindod Wells, Powys
Heels Hell
Slipping into my new shoes, I struggled to keep my balance
I wasn’t a natural heels girl. In fact, my mum even called me ‘Tina Turner’ because of previous tumbles!
But I’d had my eyes on these stunning diamanté stilettos for months. And finally, I’d caved in and bought them for my 18th birthday.
The theme was ‘Black and Bling,’ so they were a perfect addition to my outfit.
We all had a few drinks at home before heading out.
As the evening continued, my feet were really burning. But I figured it was just from standing in bars and pubs all night.
And after a quick trip for a kebab, I fell into bed and went straight to sleep.
But next morning, I woke up to a fiery pain all over my feet.
At first, I was almost afraid to look at them.
When I pulled back the covers, I saw they were entirely covered in blisters.
Even the tops of my toes!
Trying to stand up was like walking on hot coals.
They were still so bad the next day that I ended up going to hospital, limping about in slippers.
‘My new shoes have given me all these blisters,’ I told the nurse.
She raised an eyebrow, and I could tell she thought I was being a bit dramatic. But when she saw them, she gasped.
‘I’ve never seen anything like this,’ she said.
A doctor asked if I was allergic to anything, and when I told him I had a latex allergy, he explained the blisters might be a reaction to the diamanté glue.
‘We’ll have to drain these blisters now,’ he said. ‘And probably again in a few days.’
In the end, it was four weeks before I could wear normal shoes.
Those heels were gorgeous, but from now on, I’m a flats girl!
Jess Helling, 29, Cumbria
Break a leg — or two!
Watching my fiancé Paul grab his football kit, I rolled my eyes.
‘You better not go breaking your leg or anything,’ I said.
We were due to go to a christening that day, and I’d asked him not to play football. But he’d insisted.
‘Don’t worry,’ he chuckled. ‘I’ll meet you there.’
Together for nearly three years, our wedding was six months away.
We’d planned a church do with a hotel reception in stunning hilly grounds.
Later that morning, I got a call from Paul’s friend.
‘You better come to A&E,’ he said. ‘Paul’s broken his leg after a tackle.’
‘You’re joking!’ I sighed.
Having to miss the christening, I joined Paul at hospital where a doctor explained he’d suffered a serious break in his leg.
After a week, he was allowed home on crutches.
Then, with just six weeks before our big day, I was helping Paul out a taxi when I slipped on the kerb and fell.
When I woke the next day, my foot was black and blue.
‘I need to go to A&E,’ I told my mum, who dropped us there.
With Paul on his crutches and me hobbling behind him, we looked a right pair!
The nursing staff and doctors all came and had a look and couldn’t stop their giggles.
It turned out I’d broken my foot. I had to go to my final dress fitting with it in plaster.
And for my hen do, I’d picked a venue where people danced on tables.
Instead, I had to shuffle on crutches on the floor, while my friends all boogied away!
Luckily, my cast came off a few days before our big day, although Paul was still on his crutches.
There were plenty of jokes in the speeches about breaking a leg and getting legless!
Amanda Scott, 57, Preston, Lancashire
A point well made
After the nail tech completed the finishing touches, I stretched out my hands in admiration.
‘They’re perfect,’ I beamed. ‘Thank you!’
I loved getting my nails done.
Working as a lollipop lady, I purposely chose designs the kids would love.
I’d had Mickey Mouse faces and even chalkboards with sums written on them.
Today, I’d gone for coloured-pencil shapes.
And even better, they were glow in the dark!
At work the next day, the kids loved them.
Then, a week later, I was on the phone to my dad when I suddenly felt an intense stinging in my right eye.
Soon my vision went blurry too.
Worried, I went to the chemist.
‘It could be shingles,’ the pharmacist said.
Back home, the pain was so intense, I rang a friend and they took me straight to hospital.
‘I can barely see out my eye,’ I explained to the doctor.
He diagnosed conjunctivitis, but the pain felt too horrific for that.
Next day, still in agony, I was referred to an optometrist.
‘You’ve scratched two thirds of your cornea’, he said.
We both looked at my sharp nails.
‘Oh my goodness,’ I gasped.
I couldn’t believe my beloved nails had caused this.
I’d had no idea I’d scratched my eye, but now looking at the pointy edges of my nails, I realised how dangerous they were.
The optometrist gave me a special contact lens to protect my eye and aid healing.
After a week, my eye felt a lot better, and my vision returned.
When I told friends and family about my nail nightmare, they couldn’t help but chuckle.
Now, fully recovered, I still love getting my nails done.
But I make sure to choose less pointy styles - and keep my nails well away from my eyes!
Vanessa Leedham, 52, by email