After a traumatic birth, I was in agony for years. Then one day, doctors made a shocking suggestion. By Sarah Haselwood, 43
As I held the little bundle in my arms, relief washed over me.
It was over.
I’d just given birth to my son James, and it had been a traumatic experience.
During the delivery, he got stuck and doctors had to pull him out using forceps, which resulted in me having stitches. I’d been left with anal fissures — tears in the lining of my large intestine near my anus.
‘They should heal by themselves within a few weeks,’ the doctor said.
But after a few weeks, I was still in pain every time I went to the toilet.
I went to my GP who prescribed laxatives.
Over the months and years that followed, the tears showed no signs of healing.
By now, I’d had my second son Oliver via Caesarean and my anxiety about going to the loo had intensified.
When I found blood in my poo, I was referred to a consultant.
This could be serious, I thought.
But when the results came back, I felt frustrated. I was told simply to continue with the laxatives.
‘I want a second opinion,’ I told my husband Julien.
He agreed that it was worth a try so I made an appointment with another doctor. As I sat in his office, my hands twitched nervously.
‘Botox could be an option,’ he suggested.
He explained that it would relax my sphincter, easing the pain I felt when going to the toilet.
‘But I’m afraid it may not work,’ he warned.
‘I’ll give anything a go,’ I said.
But afterwards, I was still in pain. I began to search for answers online. I took Chinese herbs, saw a nutritionist and even had acupuncture.
Then a friend recommended seeing a women’s health physiotherapist. There the physio told me that my pelvic floor was too tight, and I was referred to a consultant.
At the appointment, the consultant placed a box on his desk. Then he opened it. Inside there were five metal rods.
‘These will help to stretch your bottom,’ he said.
‘But… they’re sex toys!’ I stammered.
‘I think they will help,’ he said.
At home, I started with the smallest rod first. Then I gradually went up each size.
As the size of the rods increased, the pain when I went to the toilet subsided.
Now I’m on two laxatives a day, and I no longer use the metal rods.
I’m doing well and I am a happier and healthier mother to my two young sons.
While it took me five years to find the treatment that was right for me, I want other mums to get help much sooner.
Giving birth shouldn’t wreck your life, like it did mine.