‘I’m making a BIG change!’

After a decade apart, I was reunited with my school sweetheart. But there was one big difference in our relationship. By Luci Hatch, 31

Music filled the air and as I danced, a voice shouted over the noise of the crowd.

‘Great, isn’t it?’ my friend Shelley said.

I’d felt delighted to bump into her at a Mis-Teeq concert, at the local football ground.

I was aged 12, and Shelley was 14.

We’d met months earlier at a sports competition. But our friendship had grown after discovering we had mutual friends.

Shelley was fun and seemed so confident. She wore her hair tightly cropped, with tramlines shaved down the sides, and with her baggy trousers she could easily have been mistaken for a boy.

In time, I swapped schools and ended up in the same one as Shelley.

She was in the year above me. But we hung out together and I started to realise that what I felt for Shelley was more than just friendship.

One day, as we stood together under a tree, we looked at each other and before I knew it, we were kissing.

Afterwards, we both felt a bit taken aback.

I’d never felt attracted to another girl before.

I liked it but I didn’t want to get bullied at school.

I thought: I hope no one finds out about this.

So, except for telling our closest friends, Shelley and I kept our relationship secret.

‘Hello, you,’ Shelley would say as we passed in the school corridor.

She’d slip me a romantic note or briefly stroke my hand.

I felt so comfortable with Shelley. But I was terrified someone would find out about our relationship.

Shelley didn’t care what other people thought.

As time passed, she grew frustrated by all the secrecy.

‘Why don’t you want anyone to know about us?’ she asked.

‘You know why,’ I said, trying to ignore the hurt in her eyes.

It put a strain on our relationship, and after 18 months together, we broke up.

I felt heartbroken, but told myself it was for the best.

In time, we finished school and although we were friends on Facebook, Shelley and

I didn’t see each other again.

But she’d been my soul mate and I never forgot her.

I started a relationship with a friend’s brother, David.

We went on to settle down and have three children together.

My youngest daughter was a few weeks old when one day, I received a message on Facebook that made my mouth gape open.

It was a group message, sent from Shelley to her closest friends and family.

It’s time for me to make some changes… the message began.

I read on in shock as she explained that throughout her life, she’d felt like a man trapped in the wrong body.

Shelley described how after years of torment she’d come to a decision. She wanted to transition to physically become the male she felt she was on the inside.

Shelley had started taking hormones and planned to undergo gender reassignment surgery.

She asked the group: From now on, please can you call me Shayne?

At the end of the message, she wrote: You’re the most important people in my life and I hope you’re able to support me on my journey. I’m excited for the future.

My eyes filled with tears as I realised how difficult it must have been for Shayne to understand and come to terms with his gender identity.

Now I understood his absolute hatred of girls’ clothing, and constant fighting with boys at school. There’d always been a restlessness about Shayne that I could never quite put my finger on.

I felt so proud of him and tapped out a message.

I wrote: Hi, Shayne. It all makes sense. I’m so glad you’re finally doing this.

Time passed, and my relationship with David came to an end.

Then one day, I was out shopping, when a man stopped me in the street.

‘Hey, stranger,’ he said, in a deep voice.

The man had a broad physique and facial hair. But there was no mistaking that cheeky smile.

‘Shayne!’ I said.

I felt so happy to see him.

We chatted and the connection between us was stronger than ever.

In the weeks that followed, we started meeting up with each other regularly.

Shayne opened up and told me he’d been in a long-term relationship with an older woman that had ended. I explained about my children and my break-up with David.

Shayne spoke about the transitioning journey he was on and seemed more carefree and relaxed than the person I’d known at school.

‘It’s like you’ve had a weight lifted off your shoulders,’ I said.

Six months after we’d reconnected, Shayne and I were standing in my kitchen one night, when I felt a spark in the air between us and we kissed.

After almost 10 years apart, we became a couple again.

Shayne had let his armpit hair grow and he was muscly.

But in many ways, he was still the same person I’d known all those years earlier.

Shayne was as kind and supportive as he’d always been.

He helped me with decorating the house and DIY, and my children adored him.

We’d been together a year when I supported Shayne through surgery to have his breasts removed.

When he came round after the operation, he felt thrilled.

‘I’m just so happy they’re gone,’ he said.

Now Shayne is awaiting a hysterectomy, but Covid has put things on hold.

In time, he’ll undergo an operation to redirect his urethra and allow doctors to create a penis using skin from the top of his thigh or his forearm. He’ll even be able to choose the girth and length.

‘It’ll be like going willy shopping,’ I joke.

Friends, family, and neighbours, near our home in Salisbury, Wiltshire, have been supportive.

My children are now aged 11, seven and five. But when they’re older, we’ll explain about Shayne’s gender reassignment.

Shayne and I plan to marry next year, and we’d like to have a baby together using sperm donation.

I’m so happy we reunited. I kissed a school friend, and she turned into my Prince Charming.

Shayne says: ‘All through my childhood I felt I was in the wrong sex, trapped in the wrong body. I was confident on the outside, and never got bullied, and my family always accepted me. But inside was different.

‘By the time I was 24, I was suffering from alopecia because of the stress of it all. I told everything to my GP who gave me a sheet on gender dysphoria. It all clicked then, and I finally started my journey to transition.

‘I’ve changed my name by deed poll, and my birth certificate says male. I’m really positive and excited for the future with Luci.’

● David’s name has been changed.