I booked an adventure to celebrate a new chapter. But it changed my life forever. By Chelsea Taylor, 33
I thought about how I felt when I first put it on, the look in my husband’s eyes when he first saw me in it, and I pictured it swishing around as I danced the night away.
Sitting on the end of my bed, I stared at the white gown hanging up before me.
My eyes filled with tears.
I couldn’t believe I was the beaming bride in that dress just three months earlier.
My husband and I had been together 12 years before we got married and our wedding was the best day of my life.
But soon after, I discovered my husband had been keeping something from me and I just couldn’t get past it.
‘I feel so ashamed that the marriage only lasted 12 weeks, I can’t speak to anyone else about it,’ I told my mum Julie.
But trying my best to carry on as normal was no use, because every day brought another painful reminder.
If it wasn’t the wedding dress that was still hanging in my room, it was the thank-you cards that had been delivered.
And then came the photos.
I threw myself into my job as a firefighter and that really helped.
Changing into my uniform every day felt like I was putting on my armour and it gave me strength.
Once my divorce was finalised, I wanted to do something positive to mark the start of this new chapter in my life.
‘I’m going to go travelling,’ I decided.
After posting about my plans on Facebook, my friend Robyn messaged me.
Do you want a travel buddy? she asked.
Robyn was active and up for adventure like me, so I said yes. And soon, we were jetting off to Costa Rica together.
‘My heart feels like it’s healing’
Over the next four weeks, we surfed in the Pacific Ocean and snorkelled in the Caribbean.
We hiked and even rode horses up the mountains.
It was a beautiful country and the air there felt so pure and clean.
As I breathed it in and exhaled, it felt like all the trauma from the past two years was leaving my body.
‘Pura vida,’ the locals would say, which translated to ‘pure’ or ‘simple’ life.
‘My heart feels like it’s healing,’ I said to Robyn. ‘Life feels good.’
Two days before we were due to fly home, we cycled to a local waterfall.
The pool below looked deep, so we climbed the waterfall and took turns jumping in.
On my third jump, I leapt into the water but on my way down, my bum hit a rock, hidden under the spray.
Pain surged through my back and, when I landed in the water, numbness crept down my legs.
‘What’s wrong?’ Robyn, who was a paramedic, asked.
‘I think I’ve broken my back!’ I cried.
‘Everything’s going to be OK,’ she said, trying to reassure me.
Robyn helped me out of the water, and we pushed our bikes back to a small shop, where Robyn called a taxi to take us to the hospital.
There, I was given a morphine injection and underwent an X-ray.
‘You haven’t broken your back, it’s a spinal cord trauma,’ the doctor said before prescribing me a list of medication.
The pain was excruciating, and returning to our hostel, I noticed the skin on my back and thighs had turned black.
Robyn had to help me use the toilet and shower.
‘I’m so sorry you have to do this,’ I said.
‘You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for,’ she replied.
Robyn called my mum who booked us a private transfer to the capital San José, and the next day we flew to Miami.
By the time we were on the nine-hour flight home, I was in so much pain, I had to lie flat on the floor.
‘It’s too painful to sit up,’ I told Robyn.
A friend picked us up from the airport and drove me straight to my local hospital in Perth, where I had an MRI scan.
‘You’ve got multiple fractures in your back,’ the doctor said. ‘We think you need emergency surgery.’
‘What?’ I gasped.
For the last four days, I’d been walking around with a broken back, a chipped tailbone, and liver damage.
In the early hours, I was transferred to hospital in Dundee, where I was treated with traction therapy instead of surgery.
My parents and my brother Mark visited me, and seeing them, I welled up.
‘I’m so glad that you’re here,’ I said.
A week on, I was discharged with a wheelchair and a walking frame.
I was used to being independent, but I couldn’t manage on my own.
So, I moved in with Mum and Dad.
After finishing her 12-hour shift at work, Mum would come home and then look after me.
‘I feel like such a burden,’ I said as she washed my hair.
‘I’m your mum, this is what I’m here for,’ she replied.
‘I’m so worried about the damage being permanent, but I’m too scared to ask the doctors,’ I admitted.
Soon after, it became apparent that surgery was my best option.
But as there was a long wait, I decided to move back to my place in Aberfeldy, Perth & Kinross.
I wore a back brace to go out, needed a seat in my shower, and used a frame to go to the loo.
The pain took its toll both physically and mentally, so most days it was easier to stay in bed.
Finally, after nine months, I had surgery on my back.
Waking up afterwards, I felt instantly different.
The excruciating pain I’d been living with had gone.
‘I feel hopeful about my future again,’ I said to Mum.
Back home, I began a long recovery process with physio where I had to learn to sit up, walk, and regain my strength.
The Fire Fighters Charity was amazing, helping with some of my rehab.
In time, I returned to work on light duties.
‘I feel like I’m back to square one’
But within a few months, I’d been declared fit enough for operational duties again.
It seemed like my life was finally back on track.
But 10 months after my surgery, I slipped and fell while getting changed out of a dry suit after a water rescue job.
I struggled on, but two months later, the pain became so unbearable, I had to be signed off work again.
‘I feel like I’m back to square one,’ I said to Mum.
Months later, I had a second operation.
But a nerve in my leg was irritated during the surgery
I was also diagnosed with degenerative disc disease.
‘In a couple of years’ time, we hope to put metal plates in the base of your spine to strengthen it,’ my surgeon said. ‘But for now, it’s about managing the pain.’
Once again, I had to rely on family and friends to help with simple things like getting showered and dressed.
I so desperately wanted to get back to the job I loved and exploring more of the world, but now that seemed impossible.
‘My life is unrecognisable from what it was before,’ I told Mum.
‘You’ve got through this before, you can do it again,’ she replied. ‘I don’t know anyone more determined than you.’
Her words made me think back to all I’d endured over the past few years and how I’d managed to keep going.
Later that evening, I reached for my work uniform and hung it up on my wardrobe.
I thought about all those days when I couldn’t face the world but I put on that uniform and showed up.
And suddenly, getting back to the old me didn’t seem so impossible.
That holiday was meant to be the start of a new chapter.
But while it changed my life in a totally different way, I’m determined to stay positive and get my life back on track once again.